This book was not the work of an expert, unless two decades as a professional storyteller has made me an expert in that particular field. Even then, it’s not like you have to take a test and get a license. I’m only here because, in the late ’90s, I realized they’ll basically let anybody do it.

— Jason Pargin, I’m Starting to Worry About This Black Box of Doom, St. Martin’s Press, Ch. Afterword, p. 392, 2024